Something About You - Jamelia

*****
I could talk to you for days
You make me laugh one thousand ways
And I realise - you fill me up
Like hot water - in my tea cup
I'm enchanted by your smile
I must admit it took a while
For me to see that - this was something
More than - he's my friend, it's nothing
*****

I so like this song right now, makes me smile...

Streamyx and BitComet

You can say these two 'technologies' changed my family's life.

My dad spends so much time in front of his pc nowadays I think he 'talks' to it more than he does to me. Ting spent so much of her time watching downloaded movies and chatting online when she was back home for hols, so much so that when she left, Hwa and I felt like we have just lost a piece of furniture.

Nowadays, my dad wakes up in the middle of the night to check whether the line is faster, and adds on a few more items to be downloaded if he can.

Last night, I suddenly realised I have all the latest seasons of CSI, House, Nip/Tuck, CSi:Miami, CSI:NY, Lost and Grey's Anatomy to choose from. Courtesy of Hwa and Dad. So many shows, so little time!

We have officially turned into a family of download freaks.

Dad has offered me his laptop to take with me to the semi-hole, so take a good guess what I would be doing there...

A new beginning?

Or the beginning of the end?

Life has its many crossroads and junctions.

And I have reached one of them.

I have gotten a job offer. A damn good offer too. Except for the part that requires me to move away from KK, to a place I am reluctant to go move to! But regardless, I have accepted the offer. So out goes my UK/NZ Working Holidaymaker visa plans next year. And maybe no turtle-loving trips too next year. My plans to see HH and her baby in Jan looks pretty bleak too now.

I already know what my future is like if I stay on with the current company. So its time for a detour.

Its funny how I used to complain on and on about work. Somehow it seems the moment I have decided to resign, life at work seems to have gotten better. Relationship with colleagues have gotten better. We have even started bowling and karaoke activities on Fridays to get ourselves out of the office early.

I am going to miss them a lot. Sniff... Haven't thrown in letter already start getting emotional.

Why haven't put in letter? Waiting for the results of my medical checkup and the green light to do that from the new company. Don't want to be left out in the cold if I fail my checkup.

And guess what? According to my audiogram, I have mild hearing loss problem in one ear. Hope that will not be a problem.

~added on 29th Sept 2006~

Blood test results are out! But my dear doc has gone on emergency leave... her dad has passed away. So wait... wait... wait... Tick tok Tick tok... Time is really running out for me.

Happy Birthday to me...

Happy Birthday to me,
Happy Birthday to me,
Happy Birthday to me,
Happy Birthday to me...

Another year has passed me by. Older but not necessarily wiser. There are some things that I have learnt. And some mistakes I still continue to repeat.

Revisting a blog I posted previously on Friendster:

Things every woman should have and should know by the time she's 30:

By 30, you should have:

1. One old boyfriend you can imagine going back to and one who reminds you of how far you've come.
2. A youth you're content to move beyond.
3. A past juicy enough that you're looking forward to retelling it in your old age.
4. The realization that you are actually going to have an old age - and some money set aside to help fund it.
5. An email address, a voice mailbox and a bank account - all of which nobody has access to but you.
6. A resume that is not even the slightest bit padded.
7. One friend who always make you laugh and one who lets you cry.
8. Something ridiculously expensive that you bought for yourself, just because you deserve it.
9. A skin-care regimen, an exercise routine and a plan for dealing with those few other facets of life that don't get better after 30.
10. A solid start on a satisfying career, a satisfying relationship and all those other facets of life that do get better.

By 30, you should know:

1. How to fall in love without losing yourself.
2. How you feel about having kids.
3. How to quit a job, break up with a man and confront a friend without ruining the friendship.
4. When to try harder and when to walk away.
5. How to kiss in a way that communicates perfectly what you would and wouldn't like to happen next.
6. How to live alone, even if you don't like it.
7. How to take control of your own birthday.
8. That you can't change the length of your calves, the width of your hips or the nature of your parents.
9. That your childhood may not have been perfect, but it's over.
10. What you would and wouldn't do for money or love.
11. That nobody gets away with smoking, drinking, doing drugs or not flossing for very long.
12. Who you can trust, who you can't and why you shouldn't take it personally.
13. Not to apologize for something that isn't your fault.
14. Why they say life begins at 30.

Last year in Oct, I got 80% of them done. And this year, I'm up to 87.5%.

Stressed

Why? Why? Why?

I was doing so well this morning... happily churning out design drawings. But now totally brain-dead! Can't even figure out a simple design logic.

Arghhh!!!

I need a drink! A ciggie! Anything... damn it why does this always happen!

How very blur of me...

YL's top three blur moments this month

No. 3
I nearly walked into the men's toilet somewhere. Was wondering why a happy friendly uncle was so determined to block my way until he said, "You really have a lot of things on your mind" and pointed to the next doorway, i.e. the ladies room.

No. 2
I missed my flight to Sandakan for a meeting. I had happily assumed the flight is at its usual 7.45 am but didn't realised MAS has rescheduled it 15 mins earlier the week before. Counter was already closed when I got to the airport. And yes, I did not read my ticket before hand. My colleagues found it hilarious. My client was not amused, the rest of team got there!

No. 1
I bought durians one afternoon and went back to work. Totally forgot about them until when I opened my car door again at 10 plus at night. My car stank for the whole week.

Hate Me

one of my current fave anthems..

Hate Me by Blue October

I have to block out thoughts of you, so I don't lose my head
They crawl in like a cockroach leaving babies in my bed
Dropping little reels of tape to remind me that I'm alone
Playing movies in my head that make a porno feel like home
There's a burning in my pride, a nervous bleeding in my brain
An ounce of peace is all I want for you, Will you never call again?
And will you never say that you love me just to put it in my face
And will you never try to reach me, it is I that wanted space

(Chorus)
Hate me today.
Hate me tomorrow.
Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you.
Hate me in ways, yeah ways hard to swallow.
Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you.

I'm sober now for 3 whole months, it's one accomplishment that you helped me with.
The one thing that always tore us apart is the one thing I won't touch again.
In my sick way I want to thank you for holding my head up late at night
While I was busy waging wars on myself, you were trying to stop the fight
You never doubted my warped opinions on things like suicide or hate
You made me compliment myself when it was way too hard to take
So I'll drive so fucking far away that I'll never cross your mind
And do whatever it takes in your heart to leave me behind

(Chorus)
Hate me today.
Hate me tomorrow.
Hate me for all the things i didn't do for you.
Hate me in ways, yeah ways hard to swallow.
Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you.

And with a sad heart I say bye to you and wave
Kicking shadows on the street for every mistake that I have made
And like a baby boy I never was a man
Until I saw your blue eyes cry and I held your face in my hand
And then I fell down yelling "Make it go away!"
Just make her smile come back and shine just like it used to be
And then she whispered "How can you do this to me?"

(Chorus)
Hate me today.
Hate me tomorrow.
Hate me for all the things i didn't do for you.
Hate me in ways, yeah ways hard to swallow.
Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you.

HATE ME (by Blue October)

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~forgive me for my gothic and morbid tendencies nowadays... i hope it's a passing phase too~